Things Found In My Yard


Tuesday Night Delight

As I’ve mentioned in the past, Parking is a contentious issue in my neighborhood.  I shy away from parking in Lois’ spot because I don’t want to have any arteries severed.  I haven’t, however, laid down the law about people parking in front of my house, mostly because I’m a pussy and would probably get cut trying to keep someone from parking in front of my house.

And I’m very against getting cut.

Clearly, just a tender soul that wasn’t made for Ghetto Living.

Anyway.  Last night as I’m headed home, a dodge durango is parked in front of my house.  I’m a bit annoyed, but mostly in that “not going to do shit about this” way.  As I’m walking into my house, I realize that not only were there people in the car, but there was definite swaying action going on.

Now, I can only speculate.  It’s possible they had their Jack LaLane juicer in there and were making smoothies and the swaying action was from a team of lumberjacks sawing into coconuts.  But, given that the windows were a bit foggy, I’m going to assume there was something else, more lovemaking-esque going on.

Perhaps this solves the mystery of how condom wrappers end up in my yard.

2008-dodge-durango



Condom Wrapper – Thursday Night Lovin’
August 21, 2009, 9:03 pm
Filed under: Icky, Safety | Tags: , ,

What a treat.  I found a condom wrapper. Glad to see the kids in my neighborhood are practicing safe sex, but you have to ask yourself a few questions here, though.

  1. Where’s the condom? (not that I want to find that in my yard)
  2. Did people begin having sex in my yard and decide to finish elsewhere?
  3. Could this be any more disgusting?

Thursday Night Lovin'