Things Found In My Yard


Those Ribbons People Swirl Around at Gymnastics

Maybe.

Anyway.  I walk out one morning and notice a giant ribbon of what presumably is dry wall tape running the length of my yard.  No really, it stops at one fence and goes to the other.  My neighbors were untouched.

Once again, I’m left wonder, “what the fuck?”  I mean lets think about it.  Like really think about it.  What would one be carrying that would require this much tape other than drywall?  And if you were carrying drywall, wouldn’t you need tape?

And if you dropped this much drywall tape, wouldn’t you notice?  Was someone trying to toilet paper my house and failed?  Or just stopped caring when they saw the state of my grass.

I like the image of my local kids, running about at 4 AM twirling with glee, dragging this white ribbon behind them like some ridiculous toy before getting bored and ditching the shit in my yard.  Because somehow that explanation makes more sense to me.